Tuesday, 23 October 2012

11 SIGNS SHE'S CHEATING ON YOU

Finding out that a girlfriend is cheating on you can be a sickening shock. There is so much press about men cheating on women, the fact that women sometimes cheat on men is unheard of. If you suspect that your girlfriend is being unfaithful, look for a combination of tell-tale signs and clues. However, keep in mind that there is no more definitive sign of cheating other than catching your girlfriend in the act.




1. She detaches herself from your family
The fact that she no longer wants to attend your family's functions or hang with your friends is one of our signs she's cheating on you. This sign may be indicative of cheater's remorse on her part, which means that she likely feels guilty about cheating. The less she immerses herself in your circles (which contain people who are painful reminders of her sins), the less mental anguish she'll have to endure.



2. She nags you incessantly
Gone are the days when the two of you could communicate with harmonious precision. Now, every sentiment you express sets her off and she finds any excuse to lash out at you.

If such an about-face sounds familiar, she may be subconsciously trying to justify her little tryst. Nagging you helps eliminate or at least ease her nagging guilt. So if she habitually begins to point out your every flaw, you may want to get to the bottom of what's really going on because it's one of our signs she's cheating on you.







3. She has a mysterious friend
A telltale sign that your woman is cheating arises when a mysterious friend inches his way into the picture. Whether it's someone she claims is a coworker or an old friend from way back, she keeps this friendship under wraps and is hesitant to share any general details about him, much less introduce you. And it doesn't take a Ph.D. to figure out why.



4. She engages in secretive behavior
Cheating girlfriends often become very guarded and cagey. Dr. Reena Sommer, a divorce and affair consultant and author of the book "The Anatomy of An Affair," observes that when cheating mates are working on a computer, they are often quick to close or change a program window whenever you approach. Similarly, Dr. Robert Huizenga, an infidelity coach quoted in an article on Womansdivorce.com, says that a cheating girlfriend may begin to delete emails from her email inbox, where before she let them accumulate. A cheating girlfriend may suddenly start taking her ringing cell phone into another room before answering it, and then delete the caller ID number once she's finished the call.








5. She deflects simple questions
You should be suspicious of your girlfriend when she refuses to answer the simplest and fairest of questions or answers questions only after repeating them back to you, which usually indicates a mind that's searching for a lie. Be wary of times when, rather than reveal that she got home at midnight, she begrudgingly asks, "Why do you want to know what time I left the coffee shop?" If she gets defensive about disclosing information that she used to volunteer without hesitation, she may be hiding something or someone and it's one of the surest sings she's cheating on you.




6. She shifts priorities away from you
If she is involved in a hot and heavy romance with someone else, you'll definitely feel a shift in her daily priorities. Suddenly, there are no more implied Sunday dates at the movies or something always comes up on dance-lesson Thursday. There is a tendency for most philanderers to schedule meetings with their new flame as often as they can, which results in a complete disregard for previous engagements.




7. She puts more effort into looking sexy
You may like her just the way she is, but that won't stop her from trying to dazzle her new fling. Just as you tried to impress each other at the beginning of your relationship, she'll try to impress her new flame with a sudden urge to improve her style, change her makeup and alter her physical appearance for the new man in her life. So, while her desire to look sexier is one thing, not caring about your opinion on the matter is quite another.



8. She becomes autonomous
One of the biggest signs she's cheating on you is her breaking away from your little two-person unit to become more autonomous. She has dropped "we" from her vocabulary in favor of "I." Moreover, she does more things on her own and stops consulting you about future plans. In short, she conducts herself in ways that hint that she no longer needs you to hold her hand. Whether she's hoping you'll leave her or she's simply looking for more time to lead her "double life," it's safe to conclude that she wants you out of the picture -- she just can't build up the nerve to leave you.



9. She has no interest in sex with you
When your relationship was new, the two of your were full of passion and open to spontaneous lovemaking. Now it's all a bit iffy, whereby you're rarely hitting the sheets and you're only doing so if and when she feels like it.

On a slightly more ego-bashing note, she may suddenly become bored by your performance and appear to be thinking about someone else when you do make love. Cheating may be wrong, but you can't deny that unlawful sex is usually more exhilarating. So, if you can no longer satisfy her sexually, someone else may be rubbing her the right way.






10. She's secretive about her schedule
She may claim to no longer have time for any extracurricular activities with you, yet she has one foot out the door the minute one of her girlfriends calls. Either that or she has been "going away on business" one too many times. And when she does leave, her whereabouts are sketchy at best and you are somehow always the last to know.

Disclosing her itinerary to you at the last minute and overlooking your plans in the process can mean many things, one of which isn't that she's forgetting, but rather leaving you out.



11. You become irrelevant
What could be worse than a girlfriend who nags you about absolutely everything? How about one who stops noticing that you're even alive? Just as No. 9 on our list of signs she's cheating on you is a possibility (she nags you incessantly), the opposite could be yet another clue of your loves cheating ways.

All at once, she doesn't care if you don't want to go to the ballet with her; she'll just find somebody else with whom to go. And whatever opinion you may have, be it about how she looks or how you're feeling, is met with a tepid response. In other words, she doesn't place the same importance on what you think and what you do as she once did, especially on things that directly affect the relationship.





NB: More importantly, don't let what may just be a bad case of jealousy taint your perception of her. Reading her the wrong way or jumping to conclusions can permanently sever a relationship; get all the facts before you confront her.

Tuesday, 2 October 2012

Nigeria Marked Her 52 Years As An Independent Country. (Oct. 1st) Celebrating Failure And Disappointments.


Yesterday, Nigeria marked her 52 years as an Independent country (October 1st). Is there any reason or reasons for Nigeria to celebrate? Do we have any reason to cut cake in the guise of celebrating our independence? Do we celebrate to remember when Britain handed over a country which foundation was not properly laid? Do we suppose to pop Campaign to celebrate Nigeria at 52? Do we suppose to roll out our drums to beat in celebration of Nigeria?

Why do we celebrate? We celebrate for accomplishments. We celebrate when we have recorded some element of successes in our endeavors. Nobody celebrates failures. It is unheard of for a couple who have been married for 10 years without children to celebrate their marriage anniversary. Success has many relations while failure is an orphan. Nigeria has no reason to mark 52 years of independence with pomp and pageantry. There are many reasons we should not celebrate; rather we should be in a sober reflection because our nation is a state of flux. How can we celebrate when?

REASONS NOT TO CELEBRATE IT:


  • There is no stability in power supply
  • Our educational system is in total mess such that our youths cannot get admission without sorting out and the affluence sends their children to schools in Ghana and Benin Republic
  • Our leaders sit by and watch part of our land (Bakassi) being ceded to Cameroon without a fight
  • Our hospitals are in disarray, such that the wife of our President could be in German hospital
  • Our roads are in dilapidated situation from west to east, north to south-south
  • Our leaders make more money than Nigeria through corrupt practices
  • We cannot produce our fuel for local consumption, no functional refineries 
  • Boko haram are harassing everybody, bombing Christians and even asking our own President to turn to Islam or be forced out of office. 
  • Kidnappings of Nigerians and foreigners have become the order of the day
  • We cannot conduct free and fair election without killings
  • Armed robbers have taken over the land
  • There are no aircrafts to fly over Nigeria such that passengers have to queue up for flight tickets and some flight cancellations. We depend on foreign airlines.
  • An average Nigerian cannot afford to feed 3 square meals a day

If you look at the above parameters, you will agree with me that there is no reason we should cut cakes as it was done here by the President and some of his guests yesterday. It shows that we are celebrating failure and disappointments. Nigeria is in total comatose. Our president can praise himself to the high heaven, but the truth is that we are living in the past glory, if we have ever had one before. Our so called leaders have destroyed this nation. Our founding fathers like Zik, Awo, Balewa, Belo, Okpara etc had a very good intention for this nation, but since the incursion of the military into politics, our leaders lost focus, vision and bravery to tackle the problems of this country. 


As it is now, we have nothing to celebrate. I have seen nothing happening in this country that could motivate one to celebrate our Independence. Those men and women born the same time Nigeria got independence but are yet to stand on their feet will think twice about the whole issue of celebrating with Nigeria, because the country has failed them. Those children of independence should be those who should be holding the Green White Green flag of Nigeria in both hands, but I can tell you that such group does not even want to be reminded of Nigeria.